What Can Be Done (2) - Bring out the strengths...

 6.Weakness Vs Strengths: It is very easy to make a list of weaknesses which the child has, but we need to focus on the bright side. What is the child good at? Singing? Dancing? Painting? Does he/she have a mechanical ability? Is the child creative? Once your child’s talents and strengths come to the fore, it will be easier to just think of what can be done with those talents, as opposed to worrying about his lack of writing skills or counting ability. These accomplishments will also help boost the child’s self image and self esteem.

 7.Change the methodology: It has been proven that they are intelligent children with lots of potential. We need to change the teaching methodology in order to utilize their potential to the maximum. The traditional methods of teaching and education are very inconsistent and at times, even barbaric, for such children. They lose interest very fast and become discouraged at the lack of results. Even with a high IQ, dyslexic children fail to cope up with the demands of a traditional classroom and testing system and fall further behind in the rat race. Studies have shown that dyslexic children use four times as much lactic acid in the sound processing portion of the brain as compared to normal children. This shows they have to exert four times the normal effort to read, as compared to normal reader. We need to go in for a remedial or alternate system of education, which employs the maximum use of colorful presentations, web chats, smart phones, computers, televisions, e-chats etc. These technology-aided methods are sorely needed to make the process of education easier and interesting for dyslexic children. 

 8.Create a support group or system: Support systems have been around for a long time. They should not be viewed in the negative sense. The family which has a dyslexic child should try and create a group of close friends and families from their immediate neighborhood or similar social circles and inform and educate them about dyslexia. But before doing this, the sensitivity level of the individuals participating in the social group must be evaluated. An insensitive person or someone with misguided zeal may do more harm than good. Other than support, these groups also offer a close bonding ground for the children, whose social skills are already rusty. The group contributes towards the social, moral and all-round upbringing of the child and therefore, is a valuable asset.

 9. The child should not be left behind in terms of knowledge and information:

The main consequences may include problems in reading comprehension and reduced reading experience that can impede growth of vocabulary and background knowledge of the child – that should not happen. With all the other sources and methods, we need to ensure that part. They might just surprise you with their grasping powers and ingenuity.

 10. Support

·         Sensitive society &school

·         Understands the child

·         Proper guidance

·         Protects child’s self –esteem

·         Opportunity should be equal

·         Right to be in normal schools/Remedial education

·         Treatment or Therapies

Ma... How should I change my writing?

5. Work hard on building the child’s self –esteem:     

  

   We have seen that quite a few people have overcome their difficulties and made it big in life. The difference is, if the child feels good about himself/herself, the child will definitely succeed in life. If s/he feels inferior, s/he will fail. The self image of a child has an important role in this which makes him/her self confident.

Strong Ego ----> Positive Self Image ----> Confidence ----> Self- esteem ----> Perform better

Dyslexic leaders around the world have something to say about confidence and self esteem.

•   "Reading is just one way of communicating—and in the future, I think it won't be as important as in the past."
•   "I frankly think dyslexia is a gift. If you are supported in school and your ego remains intact, then you emerge with a strong work ethic and a different view of the world.” -Dr. Cosgrove.

Yes, all of the above will happen if the ego remains intact. The “if” is important here. Sigmund Freud’s theory said - the id, ego and superego are functions of the mind. According to this model of the psyche, id is the set of uncoordinated instinctual trends; the super-ego plays the critical and moralizing role; and the ego is the organized, realistic part of the mind and affects the individual personality.

If somebody’s ego is targeted, for the most part, it affects him/her negatively. It also puts a downward spin on his/her self-image, which consequently leads to a low confidence level and self-esteem. Children start thinking that they’re good for nothing, and that their presence in society is a burden. This line of thinking is extremely dangerous, both for the child and for the parents, and can lead to disastrous consequences, if not checked in time.

A simple example will help you understand. A six year old girl comes home in tears. When asked by her mother, she says, “Ma, my best friend showed my writing book to the entire class today and they laughed at me. When the ma’am came, I asked her to help. But she took one look at the book and laughed with the rest of the class and told me that I had the worst handwriting in the whole class. How should I change my writing?” 

What a terrible thing to happen to a little dyslexic girl? Beautiful penmanship is not in the child’s hands. She simply cannot do it. But our education system gauges a child’s ability to learn by the amount of work he/she writes down. This is next to impossible for a dyslexic child. How one wishes that the system had some alternative methods for assessing such children’s acuities! The educators themselves need to be educated with regard to this matter, otherwise it will definitely prove to be detrimental to the child’s mental health.

Furthermore, we need to teach our dyslexic children how to handle critical situations and not allow anybody to attack their ego.   He/she should be trained like a soldier and prepared to tackle any social situation that might arise out of sheer ignorance. Their defences should be well polished and ready for “attack” as and when required. That is not to say we teach them to be rude to others. We’re simply trying to empower the children to protect their fragile ego and defend themselves.

For instance, if someone says to a dyslexic child,” Oh, your writing is so bad. No one can read it.” The child can reply, ”Yes, that’s true, but my presentations and oral skills are excellent and no one can beat me in them.”

Despite all the precautions we take, the child may go back to point zero and start harboring negative thoughts and feelings, the result of his/her daily interactions with people and situations. As a parent, you should understand that the child will feel bitter, lost, sad, angry and worthless, but if you handle him/her with love, acceptance and warmth, the child will surely come out of his depression and try again. Your only tools are your love, support and encouragement. Go all out and envelop the child in your safety blanket, but also make him/her strong from within. 

Two innocent questions...

A little six year old girl looks up to her mother and asks,”Ma! When will I be writing like my friends? All of us started writing at the same time. They’re writing and drawing so nicely, why does my writing look like this? Am I stupid?”

A touching question by a little girl, who is troubled by the fact that her handwriting is indecipherable to others. If it’s just a question of bad handwriting, why am I going forth with this blog? What is my objective? There are two very powerful reasons behind my writing this blog and trying to get it across to millions of readers out there. One, to try and answer the queries of parents and teachers of children who have been struggling with learning difficulties for a long time, and two, to let these children, who have been called ‘stupid’ and ‘slow’ all their lives, know that they are not!

Some children are extremely different from their peers. Some might be slow to grasp concepts, some might have trouble with their motor coordination, some might struggle to speak ordinary sounding words, some simply have trouble looking at an object and understanding its significance. These kids are usually put into brackets like “slow”, “stupid”, ”not motivated”, ”mentally retarded”,”hyperactive”, ”destructive” and so on. These are the kids you usually find in the last row of the classroom, laboring over the classwork, struggling to understand the teacher’s rapid teaching and grappling with their homework at home.

The little girl, mentioned earlier, watches a science show on TV with intense concentration. After it’s over, she asks her mother,” I have understood that the earth moves around the sun and the moon moves around the earth. If, for some reason, the earth falls down, what will happen to the moon?” The mother is nonplussed and starts thinking. Without giving her time to ponder upon the first question, the little girl now asks,”Ma, why do we need a rocket to launch a satellite in space? Why can’t an aeroplane do the same job?” Mentally retarded? Stupid? Slow to understand? I think not. On the contrary, the girl is displaying a serious knack for science and scientific thinking. This little girl, with her sunny smile, extensive vocabulary and a charming disposition wins hearts everywhere she goes. 

But let me tell you she is also dyslexic.